Worst. Finale. Ever.

Well that was a waste of five months of precious DVR time. The fact that HELEN ends up winning “The Biggest Loser” proves that Ghandi was WRONG and there is no such thing as karma.

To recap:

  • Helen is the most selfish woman ever
  • Her 26-year old daughter, who is on the show with her, cries in her interview package that she’s 26, she wants to get married, she wants to have a family, she wants to stop being the “chubby girl” which is why she came on the show
  • After week 1, Helen sends Shannon home for 30 days, because if Helen went home “she’d totally start smoking again and eating crappy.” Sidebar: Helen has been skinny before, Shannon has never been skinny. Ever.
  • Shannon returns to the ranch where she and Helen promptly fall below the yellow line
  • Helen votes to send her own daughter home, so Helen can stay on the show. After all, Shannon has already done the time at home, so she’ll be fine
  • Shannon shows up at the finale, looking better, but is decidedly still chubby
  • Helen cries every episode about how: “she can do it!” and “I need to do this for me!” Please shut your face.

I would have loved to see what Shannon could have done on this show with more time with a trainer. Good thing Helen will look great with her skinny body and super ’80’s big hair. I give her 3 months to pack it all back on. Worst. Winner. Ever.

Look at me, everybody! I’m selfish AND super unhealthy and gaunt looking! Woo hoo!

Meanwhile…Shannon still looks like this. Thanks, Mom.

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